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When my 13-year old son, Alex, was very young, I took advantage of his innocence by introducing the idea that doing drugs or smoking cigarettes was a really bad choice. I decided that if I could plant the seeds at a young age and well before any peer pressure, I stood a good chance of teaching him how and why to make smart choices. Because Alex has always been athletic, I discussed drugs and smoking as a very unhealthy choice. I explained how they would make him a slow runner. He liked running and running fast, so being a slow runner was a bad thing.

I have an uncle who, at the time, smoked cigarettes and when he visited, he would go outside and smoke his cigarettes at the end of my driveway. Although we gave him an empty coffee can for discarding his cigarette butts, he would flick the butts into the street or stomp them in my driveway. Turns out, his disrespectful ways worked to my advantage. After his visit, Alex and I would go outside and clean up after him. We would talk about how gross smoking was and what it was doing to my uncle's lungs and his overall health. I am indebted to him for helping me teach my son what not to do -- with regard to smoking and to littering.

I also discussed, many times, the danger of doing street drugs and I think my early seed-planting has worked there as well. Now that Alex is older, it's easier to have candid conversations with him about drug use. I have explained that he could try a drug casually and get addicted after just trying it once. If hearing me mention this over the years had become white noise, his health class at school has touched on these subjects more than once. There is nothing like getting reinforcements from a teacher or two to help seal the deal.

What concerns me the most is the alcohol drinking. This is really where I see my biggest challenge with my child. Alcoholism runs on my husband's side of the family. I stopped drinking alcohol altogether and my husband, John, decided to join me. While I can't say that we will never drink alcohol ever again, I can say that we are not drinking today. One-day-at-a-time works for me.

Recently, a Howard County high school student was killed in an alcohol-related car accident. It was tragic and heart-breaking. There is no greater loss. The principal sent out an e-mail explaining to parents that even after this tragedy, high school students continue to drink and post their indiscretions on Facebook.

Over the years, I've explained to Alex that when he is older and out with friends, he is not allowed to get into a vehicle if the driver has been drinking or doing drugs. I've told him he should call us and we will come get him, anytime and anywhere. I also told him that I would not embarrass him by driving right up to where ever he is, but that I would park a few houses away. I told him not to let a friend drive if he or she is "under the influence." Alex knows where I stand on this issue and how strongly I feel about this.

After the recent high school tragedy, Alex knew what I was going to say. No words were needed. He promised me with his handshake and that spoke volumes to me.

Here are some statistics from the Howard County Drug Free Web site, www.hcdrugfree.org:

* Alcohol is the drug most commonly used by teens

* Sixty-nine percent of 12th graders and 25 percent of eighth graders have tried alcohol.

Alex starts high school this fall. It is such an exciting time in his life and John and I look forward to his high school years with great anticipation. All the conversations about alcohol, drugs and smoking that I had with my then-young son were designed to make an impact on his life now. "Now" is here. I hope I did my part because now it's up to Alex to do his.

E-mail Michelle Potocko at theconsciousmother@gmail.com.

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